The Drums of Passion: Teaching the Pantarei Approach

Last Sunday, I met a friend in the park. She is a designer. She said that lately, she misses having projects that energize her to wake up and work in the middle of the night when her kids are asleep. I felt somewhat surprised and cheerful to be able to say that I had it. I do feel the drums of my passion pushing me forward. After some hibernation time, and with Covid taking its toll, they have now woken up; my drums. They didn’t wake up on their own, though. It was a constellation of effort from my side to feel happier and in my power. To do so, I let go of some past experiences, and soon after, an opportunity came knocking: Vered and Claudia, the co-founders of the Pantarei School, offered me to join their team and become a teacher in their school. This time I choose to accept their offer with both hands.

I have worked as a somatic practitioner for 25 years. Covid-19 impacted me, just like any other person. Social distancing is the opposite of my tendencies and of what I do professionally. As a practitioner, my work involves discussion and touch, and I support my clients to breathe and express themselves. I encourage connection and intimacy and invite people to feel their existence. The more that connections and closeness were absent, the more I understood thier significance in my life. How fortunate I am that my profession as a Pantarei Practitioner is a space for me to practice my values and what is important to me.

My Profession, My Vision

As adults, we learn to get on with things even when we don’t feel that our needs are being met. But when someone listens to us with care, we can relax. When someone sees our strengths and struggles, we can let go and trust. We can then feel ourselves in our varied colors, and our unique experience of reality gets validated. I would say that when we connect to someone else, we are also connecting to ourselves.

As a Pantarei practitioner, I give concentrated attention to my clients and create a safe place for their experience. I guide my clients to realize their strengths and unique being. In my working room, every emotion is welcome, and every need or thought has its place. I do my best to give my clients the feeling that no matter what they experience now or have ever experienced in their past, I will be there with them, and I can hold space for it with them. When they are in my room, I am their partner in their journey, and they can let go. I lead them through their experience and ensure that they get more tangible access to their strengths after getting in touch with their unique qualities. This allows them to transform and find new ways to deal with their challenges in life.

We all need to be seen in our humanity, understood, and connect to others. It is a matter of survival for a baby: the need to love and be loved. As children, we draw confidence from the validation of our experiences from our parents.

My Profession is My Hobby

I have “worked” with people in this way for over 25 years. But when I tell people, “I am going to work,” I still feel a bit like a cheat. Not because the value I give is unclear for me, but “work” is usually associated with hardness and effort; something one does for the money, not for pleasure. I have the luxury to WANT to go out to meet my clients. It is the drums of passion that I hear. My day is interesting and full of all the different colures of human beings, and it fascinates me and enriches me. I get to meet people that I am fond of and who often inspire me. I connect with them closely, and we experience intense and strengthening moments together.

The sessions themselves also affect me. I am entirely in my element in this space, and I would say that I am “a better” me. Not because I have to pretend that I don’t have issues or struggles. Just the opposite: I should be as open and accepting with everything in order to allow my clients that same freedom. I practice being in my body, being patient, seeing the bigger picture, and noticing all the possible options with my client. It is like a training that, if I persist, later reflects on in my personal life.

Following Up a Long Time Dream

Teaching others to create this space and make this their profession is only a natural development of my current work. But for me, it is also a long-time dream that is now becoming a reality. Already when I just started practicing as a somatic practitioner, and I was learning and assisting in the professional studies, I knew that I wanted to spend my life in this space. A space in which a group of people learns to trust themselves more, feel their qualities, and be with and give attention and support to someone else.

One of the moments in class that I love is when students watch a demonstration; magic often happens. Everyone directs their attention to the transformative process of the client. The focused attention of a group is power. It is a meaningful and empowering process for everyone involved when they all direct their attention to letting someone accept their feelings, trust themselves and others, and appreciate their individuality. No doubt that I want to be part of that.

We throw this precious stone in the water, and it makes precious waves.

When we train our attention in this way to witness the transformative processes in others, we, in turn, transmit this to our surroundings. (Mind you, not only viruses get transmitted). There is much generosity involved in this process; kindness, and compassion that can affect the world. If more of us learned to do that, we would have a world that is a bit kinder. People would be happier and more confident, and our social bonds or our “Social Closeness” would be more enriching.

The drums of passion can be louder, and our society can develop with them.

By Merav Gur-Arie